Cement Geese

I am not a fan of Geese. They poop on all my walking spots. They hiss at you like they own the place. I mean, I am not one who owns much of anything. But I don't go around shoving people off sidewalks and streets because I don't want them there. Geese do that with their nodding heads and hissy throats. They scare me. No human would ever get away with the stuff Geese pull.

But then, why is it that humans, want to make cement geese and dress them up? I will tell you why. Because they are crazy.

My grandmother lives in a condo near by. It is full of elderly people. It is a condo for seniors basically. On my grandmother's floor, someone, probably an old lady, insists on putting their stupid cement goose in the entry way to the hall. Furthermore, she (or he) dresses the thing up for holidays and seasons.

Plain Cement Goose

For summer, the goose had swimsuit. Not just any swimsuit but a very sexy pink bikini with black pokadots. The top part of the swimsuit was ridiculous. The goose had some serious plastic surgery done. Well just let's say that we wanted to make the female goose a male by losening the strings holding up the top. Don't worry we never did. We didn't have to. The Fourth of July made the goose a man overnight.

Goose in similar bikini outfit.

Fourth of July, Unlce Same came to visit with whiskers and all.

Uncle Sam

The best had to be Halloween. Surely, they should ban this costume. No one in their right mind would set this on their front porch and NOT expect a burning cross to be placed beside it.

The real deal. Condo Goose decked out Klu Klux style.

In the spring you can expect a "cute" colored rain coat. What about Easter? Well Transgender Goose not only changes sexes BUT species as well.

IS THAT A RABBIT NOSE ON THE FRONT??? You have got to be kidding me.

This month, Pochantos has made her debut. Complete with cute fake braids.

Pochantas is Thankful

I wish I had the wardrobe this goose has. Do you know how much money these things cost? The goose is $55.00. Each outfit is about $30.00 on average according to one site I visited. So let's just say this woman/man (because the same site says that these geese are like Barbies for adults. So men can play with them too!) has an outfit for each month give or take a few. Let's say this woman/man has 16 outfits for this goose.

Goose: $55.00

Outfits: $30.00 x 16= $480

Total: $535

Then does this goose has it's own drawer or a closet for all his/her's outfits and accessories? *thinks* I wonder what the inside of this woman's condo looks like.

Well, in my opinion $535 is a lot of money for a good laugh. But, hey, if you get your kicks from dressing up a cement resemblance of a disliked feathered friend then go for it. Just don't scowl at me when I stand pointing at it and while laughing.

Ok I will give this Woman/Man credit. At least they have the slight decency to put a BEARS cheerleader outfit on it. GO BEARS!!!

Magpie