SMILE your on Candid Camera

I really love my teeth. So yeah, my teeth are my pride and joy. I love taking care of them and stuff. No cavities for 23 years. No braces ever. No chips, no surgeries to correct. Yeah they are pretty much perfect except for a few imperfection.

I remember when I use to not take very good care of my teeth like when I was 10 or something like that. My uncle gave us a bunch of lollipops. Not the cheap dum dum ones. I mean like real cool huge sphere lollipops with all sorts of flavors. I would eat one or two after dinner or lunch. Well, after one of those delicious ones, I think it was strawberry cheesecake or something like that, grandma pricked my conscience:

"Do you brush you teeth after those?"

"No...sometimes I forget to brush my teeth at night too."

"WHAT? How do you do that? If ate one of those I wouldn't be able to do anything else until I brushed my teeth. And I cannot go to sleep unless I brush my teeth."

".....oh....." *finished lollipop and brushed teeth*

From that time on if I did not brush my teeth all I could think of was my poor white teeth being eaten by bacteria and sugar. And them crying for help. And all I did was sleep. So basically I can't sleep unless I brush them.

So usually I like going to see the Dentist. My teeth are all happy because they get all polished and smooth. They get their picture taken and they all smile because they know that they are well taken care of. The Dentist comes in and says, "Beautiful teeth." And you walk out of there all fresh mouthed and if you run your tongue over the surfaces of your teeth it is all smooth and clean. Yeah I like the Dentist.

However, today was different. Today was an "emergency" appoint for my poor teeth. After a month and a half of a tooth screaming after cold and hot drinks and soda drinks, I decided that I really needed it looked at. I apologized to my tooth and made an excuse as to why I waited so long. My tooth understood. Circumstances were not right for this impromptu visit :( I feared the worst. Another cavity. Another drilling. My poor sad tooth cried at the thought of a mean drill taking out a part that was with him for 23 years. I tried to explain to him that if it has to be done, he'll feel so much better. He will have the hurt cut out. He still cried. I cried too. Inside. If I went around talking to my tooth out loud I wouldn't be here typing this blog. I'd probably be arrested for drug possession or being crazy or something to that effect.

So in I walk to the Dentist office.

"Hi," I said.

"Hi, Magpie, I'll let them know you are here." Yeah they know me by name and face. ^.^ I like the Dentist.

I sat down and waited for my name to be called. There was another woman sitting a couple chairs next to me. Well after about a minute I started to get bored. Should I get a magazine to read? Nah, that would mean I'd have to walk across the office. My eye caught the really cool looking lego table. That looked fun. I started to envision all the structures to build. Someone had already built a house. I was trying to figure out what I could build. I was so tempted to get up and sit in a little chair and start building. I mean there were some really colorful legos in there. Light green...I never saw that color in lego. I saw a lot of primary colors and grey and black for planes and star wars and boats but never light green.

"Resist...resist..."

Minutes passed when I was finally called back. Whew...I could forget about playing with them. So back in the room I went. They hygienist was really nice. My tooth got a picture taken. No issues and problems showed up. Wonderful! I breathed a sigh of relief. No cavity showed up. It was great. I was happy. But what was my problem? The hygienist told me to wait and that she was going to get the Dentist.

Well, leaving Magpie in a room alone is probably not the best thing in the world. Especially with all the cool new tools that were all over the place. There were magazines on the wall. Should I read on? No....too boring. I could do that anywhere. OOooooooo the over head light. No too big to move. They would mos def recognize if that was moved. OH! That fake jaw is on the counter!!! I COULD PLAY WITH THAT! No because I have to get out of the chair.

This was my dream come true! Being able to play with forbidden objects!!!

Then...I turned to my left. What did I behold but the water spit cup/sink thingy. On the side was a little black button. I HAD to figure out what it did. I press the button and WAAALLAAA water comes squirting out of the spout above the cup. So cool. I watched and waited for the water to stop. The cup continued to fill up...no stopping in site.....shoot.

shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot. The water did not stop. It was not stopping. The cup began to overflow onto the floor and onto water-fountain-spit-thingy. So took the cup and dumped as the water continued to go all over. I pressed another button. It stopped filling the cup. Phew. It instead swirled around the sink. That was ok. At least I can handle that, right? At least, when it is in the sink it will go down the drain not all over the place. However, after a while it started back up in the cup again. I kept pressing the button to make it swirl. Finally after searching, I realized that the stand that the actual cup was on would turn off the water
so I press the plate and TA DA! The water stopped. Awesome. I. Am. A. Genius. *wink*

Now I had another problem. There was water all over the place. I had to do something. I couldn't let the dentist office know that I, Magpie...the newly graduated nurse...was playing with the dentist tools and now had water all over the place! So I creeped out of the dentist chair and tiptoed to the sink with my paper bib thing flowing silently before me. I grabbed a couple of paper towels and creeped back to my chair. The mess didn't look all the bad so I began with the large machine that was under the water spigot thingy.

On this large machine thingy were two valves. I carefully navigated the paper towel around the valve. Only I hit the last one and it started hissing. Geez...no being covert here. I quickly turned the valve off and sat back, tucked the paper towel under my leg and folded my hands. After a few minutes, I realized that no one was coming, I returned to the task at hand. I continued to wipe up what water I saw. I was going to wipe up the floor but then decided against it because it would be too tricky and risky. So I declared task completed.

I sat back deciding that maybe dental tools is not my forte. I looked around at the other things in the room. Yes, I was not content to just wait for the dentist. I wanted something to do. I turned to look at the xrays. Study my pretty teeth. It was a whole other view from what I am use to looking at in the mirror. Such whiteness...purity....and then transparency....gum line. Beautiful.

"Magpie?"
I come out of my trance and tell the dentist what's up with my poor babies. She looks at the x-ray and says, "Nothing remarkable there..." She then asked me to point out where my pain is. I do it and she says,
"Ahhh, I know what your issue is...I am going to mimic the pain..." She does so and I realize...my gums are receding :(

So yes, receded gums. I brushed too hard...too aggressively. She explains it to me and tells me what I need to do for the rest of my life.

So....this is a lifelong thing. She says it isn't a big deal but to me it is. So, I feel really bad about my teeth and what I did to them. I really feel bad. I think I will write a sorry note to my teeth...


Dear Teeth,
I realized today that I really hurt you. Please understand that
in the long run I was really trying to help you. I really was. I didn't know
that by brushing you guys like that was actually ruining you. It really tears me
up inside when I think about it. I now made you even more vulnerable to fact
that you might get cavities. I am so sorry. I will try my best to brush the way
the dentist told me to. I will even buy the special toothpaste she suggests. I
promise. I will also start to floss more too. That will help. I want to make you
happy. I don't want to lose you in my old age. I want to be with you until I
die. I am so sorry that I did this. I hope that my improved actions will make up
for the trouble that I have caused you.

Love, your bestest fan,
Magpie.

In other news, I was watching a peep video sent by one of my friends. They nerd in the video (they are nerd fighters) erroneously said that 12 peeps is the most that one can eat in a sitting. After further research, I found the original vlog where the other nerd said the most peeps in three minutes. I was too lazy to watch all 39 video response to beat the best. You know my mind...flubber. So my friend graciously watched all 39 video responses and found that the most was 20 in 3 mintues.

COME ON!!!! 20?!?!?! <_<

So I am challenged. That is it. I am going to beat this meager amount. I got online...bought a box of 360 peeps. It should arrive by the end of this week :) I am excited. I have been challenged and I will not back down!!!

Till next time my faithful readers!
Magpie!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

wow that person must be the awesomest friend ever

Maggie said...

Yep, he is a pretty awesome friend!!