or.....do it yourself ;)
1) Smile.
Even the ugliest girl in the world lights up when she smiles. Genuine smiles bring twinkles to eyes. And if you walk around randomly smiling imagine the looks you will get! Don't worry, they REALLY aren't thinking, "Wow...she's nuts." "What the heck is she smiling about." They are thinking, "Wow...she's got a great smile." And when the look around they are not trying to find what you are smiling at. They are trying to make sure no one else sees you so that you will be ALL theirs. :D Oh and they are definitely not looking at the strawberry seed stuck in between your two front teeth. Just think of that seed as smile enhancement. Smile on girlfriend!
2) Hair Toss
There is nothing better than a good hair toss. All you have to do is grab a tuft of hair...and then throw it out of your face. Let those locks flow loosely. It will drive a man nuts. Make sure you are grabbing your hair and not his. Oh and if you are grabbing his hair, you are either way too close for a hair toss or you are dating a guy with long hair. If that floats your boat go for it. I am not one for long hair though.
Speaking of long hair, the hair toss is especially effective if you have longer hair. However, do not toss your hair if the guy is two feet behind you and you have three feet of hair. That would make him hate you. No man wants a mouth full of hair. Neither would I. He might take it as a sign that you are telling him he needs more protein. No man wants to know his flaws right off the bat.
If you use Herbal Essence it makes the hair toss more fun. The smell radiates off it and permeates the whole room. I wonder if you drink Herbal Essence it will have the same effect...
3) Talk to him
It's ok. He won't bite. I promise. He looks scary. He looks like he will break you in half....with his eyes....but he can't. That would be unlawful. He'd go to jail. And if he is a good guy, he will be all for staying out of jail. Don't shake. If you start to shake your whole body will shake and then your voice will shake and then it will break and he will think you are singing to him. Just make little bits of eye contact and talk. Focus on him. Join in. Don't stutter. No one will understand a word you said.
Keep your knees loose...you don't want to faint. Do some random knee bends before talking to him. That is good. Pick up an invisible pen off the floor. Then go up and talk to him.
If you say something stupid...laugh...chances are he is not walking away thinking, "Wow...that was the worst conversation in the world." It is more like, "She can laugh at herself. That is self confidence."
Remember....breath...air is a good thing. Oxygen is your friend. Wait...slow down your breathing. Don't hyperventilate. You'll faint. Then they will take you to the ER and you will wake up fine. And then you REALLY feel like an idiot.
4) BEEEEEEEEEEEEE yourself.
Honestly, ladies, do you really want to act like someone else for someone you like? Sure he might like you back but he really not like you. He will like the fake you. Then you have to act the whole time you are with him. It is way too much work. Hey if you are up for the challenge I guess you can go for it. I am lazy. I want the guy to like me for me. He doesn't have to like EVERYTHING about me. I am annoying. Everyone is to some extent. You get over it though.
Plus, do you really want to end up in a psych ward for something that you really don't have? If you end up suddenly changing from fake girl to real girl then you might be put there for sudden altered mental status, drug detox or sudden personality change.
5) Blushing is ok.
Girl, that is a natural response. Don't comment on it. It will make you redder. Oh and if someone else mentions it don't dwell on it. Oh and don't lie...it is blushing...you did not get wind burn when the wind is blowing at negative 12 MPH outside. Just blush and be down with it. Try not to think about it. It will make you embarrassed and then you won't focus on the task at hand....interaction. DO NOT and I mean DO NOT tell him you are blushing. That is awkward. Furthermore, do not excuse yourself from interaction. Blushing is not an excuse. Your face starting on fire is an excuse. Blushing is not. Play it cool. Continue interaction. Then when the interaction is over, go hide.
6) Have fun
It is not everyday that you get to have your heart flutter and your knees quake. Butterflies in your stomach is an awesome feeling. Let it happen. Enjoy it. It is awesome. Even if it doesn't work out in the end, it was fun right?
Ok, so if it doesn't work out you are crushed and yeah it hurts. But it is ok. That is why it is called a crush right? There are like...a bazillion guys out there. Someone is bound to turn up and your crushing will start all over again.
So here's meeting people and trying out the techniques. Don't worry, I have tested them and they all work without fail.
Ok, actually I lied. I have not tested them. But nothing is saying that you can't! GO FOR IT! WOOO!! In any situation, happy dating. Go get 'em tiger...and all that jazz.
Till next time,
Magpie
Now class...what did you learn today?
Well this week was lesson week for Magpie.
1) Your car is not a safety zone.
You are not invisible in your car. I can see you pick your nose. That is just disgusting. Don't do that. Singing and dancing will provide entertainment not only for you but to other drivers around you. When you act like a rockstar in the car, everyone sees you. They do not think you are a rockstar. They think that you are crazy. But that is ok, we all know that you are not crazy. Well maybe a little. At least you are not THAT crazy. If you dance just be aware that you will get some interesing stares from your neighboring drivers. However, don't let that bother you. Dance on, Queen, dance on. They will never forget you even if you don't know them. Nice, huh? Maybe in a way you are a rockstar.
2) Water is an important entity to life.
Skimping on your water for a week is not a good idea. You will be all shirveled and gross feeling. You lips will be ready to fall off. Trying to catch up by bolus dosing yourself with 2-3 liters a day is also not good. You will be spending most of your time trying to find the nearest bathroom because you kidneys are really going to kick in. You will float away. Yeah, hypothetically not literally but you get the picture.
Water is also very important for bathing. Perfume and body spray can only cover up so many days worth of filth before you actually need to shower. Soap is useless without water. I suggest lathering up with plenty of water. Mind you I didn't put this to the test but I could mention a list of people who really need to recognize this fact.
3) Remember your parking spot.
Ok this wasn't from this past week but it is still an important lesson yet for me to learn. It is important to look competent when at your workplace. Especially if the workplace involves the lives of human beings. Losing your car in a 4 level small parking garage is not very encouraging to the people around you. Furthermore, when you still cannot find you car after covering the levels of the parking garage you really should sit down and think. When you finally find your car, it is important to note where the exit is. It really looks stupid if you go in a circle on yellow level three times because you cannot find the exit on blue level. Also, how you end up exiting on green level one floor beneath blue level is beyond me but good job. If anyone catches you, it is good to laugh it off. It will just put them at a little more ease when they see you walk into their room with an angiocath to start their IV.
4) Frozen Water is not an important entity to life.
In fact, it can be downright detrimental. The fact that you slipped once on a thin sheet of invisible ice just might be a hint or warning sign that you should slow down. I am sure that you do not want to land on your butt...twice. Instead, take it slow. People are watching you even when you don't realize it. It is better to be slow and sure rather than make a complete fool out of yourself and slip...twice.
1) Your car is not a safety zone.
You are not invisible in your car. I can see you pick your nose. That is just disgusting. Don't do that. Singing and dancing will provide entertainment not only for you but to other drivers around you. When you act like a rockstar in the car, everyone sees you. They do not think you are a rockstar. They think that you are crazy. But that is ok, we all know that you are not crazy. Well maybe a little. At least you are not THAT crazy. If you dance just be aware that you will get some interesing stares from your neighboring drivers. However, don't let that bother you. Dance on, Queen, dance on. They will never forget you even if you don't know them. Nice, huh? Maybe in a way you are a rockstar.
2) Water is an important entity to life.
Skimping on your water for a week is not a good idea. You will be all shirveled and gross feeling. You lips will be ready to fall off. Trying to catch up by bolus dosing yourself with 2-3 liters a day is also not good. You will be spending most of your time trying to find the nearest bathroom because you kidneys are really going to kick in. You will float away. Yeah, hypothetically not literally but you get the picture.
Water is also very important for bathing. Perfume and body spray can only cover up so many days worth of filth before you actually need to shower. Soap is useless without water. I suggest lathering up with plenty of water. Mind you I didn't put this to the test but I could mention a list of people who really need to recognize this fact.
3) Remember your parking spot.
Ok this wasn't from this past week but it is still an important lesson yet for me to learn. It is important to look competent when at your workplace. Especially if the workplace involves the lives of human beings. Losing your car in a 4 level small parking garage is not very encouraging to the people around you. Furthermore, when you still cannot find you car after covering the levels of the parking garage you really should sit down and think. When you finally find your car, it is important to note where the exit is. It really looks stupid if you go in a circle on yellow level three times because you cannot find the exit on blue level. Also, how you end up exiting on green level one floor beneath blue level is beyond me but good job. If anyone catches you, it is good to laugh it off. It will just put them at a little more ease when they see you walk into their room with an angiocath to start their IV.
4) Frozen Water is not an important entity to life.
In fact, it can be downright detrimental. The fact that you slipped once on a thin sheet of invisible ice just might be a hint or warning sign that you should slow down. I am sure that you do not want to land on your butt...twice. Instead, take it slow. People are watching you even when you don't realize it. It is better to be slow and sure rather than make a complete fool out of yourself and slip...twice.
5) Chocolate is really not that great.
Ok, this is not true. There is no way that this can be true. No way. Chocolate is totally awesome! It makes your brain think, it is rich in antioxidants. Chocolate is really great.
6) Chocolate is really great.
Oh....yeah.....:cool:
7) Parting on the right rather than the left produces better results.
One side of my head looks better than the other. It is just the way that I have to use my hands to style my hair. The right side is more awkward to manipulate. So the less hair to work with on that side is easier to deal with rather than have a whole bunch of hair. The left side is easier so if I do everything for that side then everything will be a-ok.
NEW TOYS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yeppers Yeppers!!!!
Magpie's got some new toys :D :D :D
Two new lenses, an IR filter and a new camera bag :D
Woot
Magpie
Magpie's got some new toys :D :D :D
Two new lenses, an IR filter and a new camera bag :D
Woot
Magpie
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)